I’m currently at work…currently finished with everything I needed to do for the day…and it is only 9:30am. Today is going to be so long and slow…just a dragged out day (I apologize ahead of time for possibly writing a million blogs today).
Unfortunately all of my days seem to be like this lately…I would much rather be lying in bed, my nice warm bed…watching Grey’s Anatomy.
Maybe it’s the cold Michigan weather, the gloomy clouds that are constantly in the skies. Maybe it’s because my house is kept at a low 62 degrees (because my crazy mother-in-law will freak out if we turn the heat on). Maybe it’s because I absolutely hate going to work in the mornings.
Either way, the only way I can describe my mood lately is “blah”
I used to be so excited about this time of year. Fall- my most favorite season. We wear lots of layers of comfy warm clothing. We can go outside and enjoy the nice cool breeze, beautiful colors of the trees; orange, yellow, red…(if you haven’t seen Michigan in the fall you should!) Carving pumpkins, visiting orchards for hot doughnuts and cider…can’t forget the hay ride through the woods! But this year is different…
I feel rushed, yet completely uninspired to do anything. I feel held back from having all the fun I did before. I feel like I have no time at all for the fun things in life. I feel like all of my time and the little bit of energy I have, goes to work and household chores.
What’s odd is…I had the same amount of time, if not more just a year ago. The summer before last I remember being on the lake with Etta constantly, if not every day! Swimming, fishing, tubing, playing at the sandbar…but this summer was different. We made it onto the lake ONE time this summer, and for only a couple of hours (which isn’t much if you are out on the lake).
So why do I constantly feel like I have no inspiration to do anything at all. Why do I not want to go explore and spend my time having fun? I’m still trying to figure that one out.
By now I’d usually have HUGE plans for Halloween, and for Thanksgiving….actually I’d probably already be thinking about Christmas. I just can’t seem to get into the mood of the “holidays” and I honestly feel overwhelmed by them. I feel like they have no part in my life right now, but they have to….for Etta.
Maybe life is a little to busy for me lately. Maybe I have too many things going on at once to want to do anything more. Maybe I am thinking way too much about this…
Maybe my mom was right when she said “At some point in life you will get “burnt-out” on wanting to do everything, and will just want to sit around and do nothing.” I pray I don’t end up like that…..