I am one of those people who has always dreamed of a big pretty wedding. I had nothing to base this off of besides movies and the occasional distant relative who invited us to their wedding. See my parents were pretty much already separated by the time I was born. My mother was a young teen and my father was starting in on adulthood with more important plans in mind than having a child…
My mother has been in the same relationship with the guy I call my step-dad for almost 20 years now, and they have never gotten around to tying the knot. My father is just the same, being with the woman I call my step-mom for over 25 years, there is still no ring on her finger either. Both parents have since had more children, settled into life and really have NO plans on signing a marriage certificate anytime soon. So this was what I grew up with, this was what I thought was normal.
On Sunday morning while I was sitting in church, as I usually do, LM stood up to give testimony and I didn’t think much of it. He stood up and started to talk about how the Lord came back into his life and helped him quit smoking and drinking cold turkey, over a year ago! Then he went into how I came into his life with Etta and how much he loves us and could never let us go. Before I could grasp what was going on he was down on one knee asking “Will you marry me?” Tears filled my eyes, and all words suddenly escaped my head. I sat there completely in shock, not knowing what I was supposed to do. I recalled all those movies I had watched in the past of proposals and finally was able to blurt out “YES!” The entire church (mostly made up of family) started clapping and cheering….We were engaged!
That afternoon was amazing, we spent time with family, laughed, loved and had a great time celebrating. That night was a different story….I was anxious….I had always joked around with LM, asking when I would get a ring, but now that it was on my finger I really had no clue what to do next. I dove into Google, pouring through site after site with “Engagement Checklists” and “How to Plan a Wedding”… I was still clueless. I went on Pinterest and pinned a million cute wedding ideas, which totally made me even more overwhelmed. Then I decided to call my mother…she may be a crazy person at times, but she’s a pretty good listener and sometimes has conceivable advice…plus I hadn’t told her the news yet.
I decided to make the call….I tapped the picture of my mom on my “favorites list” the phone rang and soon I could hear her voice, and about a million other things in the background. I started to tell her I was engaged and all I got from her was “Huh….what? I can’t hear you…hold on, I’m watching this show (goes on about the show for 15 minutes) okay, I’ll turn it down…what did you want?” Again, I told her I was engaged, just not as enthusiastic this time. After talking a while with her I realized a few things….That my mother has no clue when it comes to weddings….she thinks the bridal shower and bachelorette party are the same thing for example. She has no concept of how much a wedding costs (she was throwing these huge lavish ideas at me). And lastly, that I would be buying her a dress to wear and something for my brother and sister to wear as well since none of them have the money….and on that note, they would not be contributing to the wedding whatsoever.
So here I am….working with what the Lord gave me. Trying to plan a wedding with a mother who has no insight on the topic, sisters who are VERY hard to keep track of as bridesmaids, and a whole lot of researching and saving to pay for the wedding. I wont make it all out to sound bad…. LM is amazing and is putting the majority of the money into the budget. His father and step-mother have offered their beautifully stunning property as our reception location, and they also want to buy and cook all of the food for us. We are also blessed to have the church for our ceremony at no cost, as his family owns it. So in the end….with a little stress, a lot of work, and MANY blessings, I just might get that pretty dream wedding I always imagined!